"Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that terrible incident with the Dinosaurs."
30 years old
Matt Pisarski's Golf Statistics
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Matt Pisarski's Favorites
Where Matt Pisarski Plays Golf
Los Angeles County; San Bernardino County; Riverside County; Palm Springs Area; Orange County; San Diego County; Ventura County; Santa Barbara County; Sacramento Area; Monterey Bay Area; Santa Cruz Area; Las Vegas Area; Mesquite/St.George Area; Laughlin/Bullhead City; Phoenix Area; Western Arizona; Northern Arizona; Colorado; Northwest Coastal; Southwest Coastal; Seattle/Tacoma/Bremerton; Vancouver/Southwest; Spokane/Eastern; * Other
What's in Matt Pisarski's Golf Bag
UPDATED AFTER CLUBS STOLEN IN FEBRUARY 2019
Callaway Rogue Driver - Project X Custom Shaft
Loaned Callaway XR 3 & 5 woods with project x smoke
Taylormade M6 4-AW
Odyssey Exo 7 putter
Chrome Soft or Z stars
Last Updated: January 28, 2020
Follow me on Instagram mpisarski01
I love to play whenever I can and I love to play new courses. Please laugh at my terrible shots because I know I will.
Chuck Norris once Duffed a shot in Arizona and now we have the Grand Canyon
SO why does the golfer carry two shirts? In case he gets a hole in one.
What should you do if you're golfing near lightning? Hold your 2-iron in the air, because not even God can hit a 2-iron.
How do you know a golfer is cheating on his wife? He always puts his driver in the wrong bag.
How do you "Tiger" proof a golf course? By strategically placing fire hydrants.
Why are golf and sex so similar? They are the two things you can thoroughly enjoy even though you are really bad at them.
If you think it's hard to meet new people, pick up the wrong golf ball on the course sometime.
What's the difference between a golf ball and a Nissan? A golf ball can be driven 300 yards.
What do you do after a round of 18 on a hot sunny day? Wash your balls.
Do you know why the game is called golf? Because all the other four letter words were taken.
It's not the size of your putter that counts, its how many strokes you take.
A wife walked into the bedroom and found her husband in bed with his golf clubs. Seeing the astonished look on her face, he calmly said, "Well, you said I had to choose, right?"
If the point of golf is to hit the ball less, then do I win if I don't play at all?
Why don't golfers in England work in the afternoon? Because it would interrupt their tea time.
What does a golfer do on his day off? Putter Around.
Why do golfers put minus signs in front of their scores? Because subtraction speaks louder than words.
What did the duck say to the golf ball? Nothing it should have ducked.
Why did the blonde golfing pro cheat on his wife? Because he thought every day he needed to play around.
What did the golfer say after performing yoga? "Damn, my shaft is all bent."
What did the Mormon say to his golfing buddies? After 18 holes, I can barely walk.
Golf: a game where you yell fore, you get six, and you write five.
Mulligans are the reason golf balls come three to a sleeve.
"There are two things you can do with your head down, play golf and pray." -Lee Trevino
"Golf is my profession. Show Business is just to pay the greens fees." -Bob Hope
"You think so much of your old golf game that you don't even remember when we were married," said the pouting wife. "Of course I do, my dear -- it was the day I sank that thirty-foot putt."
Which is the easiest golf stroke? The fourth putt!
Three guys, a teenager, his father and his grandfather go out to play a round of golf. Just before the son is ready to tee off, this fine looking woman walks up carrying her clubs. She says her partner didn't show and asks if she can join them. The guys say sure, since she is quite a beautiful woman. The lady turns to the three of them and says, "I don't care what the three of you do, cuss, smoke, chew, spit, fart or whatever. Just don't try to coach me on my game". The guys say okay and ask if she would like to tee off first. All eyes are on her ass as her skirt rides up when she bends over to place the ball. She then proceeds to knock the hell out of the ball right up the middle. She just starts pounding these guys, paring every hole. They get to the 18th and she has a 12-foot putt for par. She turns around and says, "You guys have done a great job at not trying to coach me on my game. I've never shot par before, and I'm going to ask your opinions on this putt. Now if any of your opinions help me make the putt, I will give that guy a blow job he will never forget. " The guys think, 'what a deal!' The kid walks over, eyes up the putt for a couple of minutes, and finally says, "Lady, aim that putt six inches to the right of the hole. The ball will break left 12 inches from the hole and go in the cup." The father walks up and says, "Don't listen to the youngster, aim 12 inches to the right and the ball will break left 2 feet from the hole and fall into the cup." The grandpa looks at both of them in disgust, walks over picking up the ball, drops it into the cup, unzips his fly and says "That's a Gimme."
Golf Cart A man during his married years overturned his golf cart and a blonde said to him come to my place and rest. She was quite convincing and then took her clothes off once there. And he said "I don't think my wife is going to like this." And she answered "She will never know." He said "That's not the problem she's still under cart."
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Matt Pisarski's Golf Course Reviews
Went out Yesterday 4/4 using club corp $26 and tee'd off an hour earlier than my tee time of 10. Course was moderately busy with groups of 3-4 going o... » More
Went out Yesterday 4/4 using club corp $26 and tee'd off an hour earlier than my tee time of 10. Course was moderately busy with groups of 3-4 going out every 15 minuets. I joined up with two guys names John (easy to remember). We zipped around the first 5 holes then caught up to a foursome who ended up letting us pass on the back nine. We played the Black/ combos and it was the perfect length for me.
Course was in fantastic shape today as expected for spring in AZ being the peak time of the year. Fairways were lush almost carpet like throughout the day and cut short to allow roll for days. Greens were almost perfect, they were smooth and very fast all day which was consistent to the practice green. The only reason they didn't get a perfect score was 2 false edges had some growth issues and I found both of them. Rough can only be described by one work "diabolical" It was 3 inches thick and very penal. I had issues on the 600 yard up hill Par 5 13th, It took me an extra 2 strokes to make perfect contact to get out of it. I sure found a lot of rough yesterday and it kicked my a#$. Tee boxes were a little chewed up and should be moved around but it wasn't anything to be mad at. The only thing that disappointed me was the sand traps they were all wet and firm. They need a lot of TLC.
Overall I really enjoyed this course and with the well placed tree's and narrow fairways Accuracy off the tee is a must. Also the greens were very tough to play with lots of false edges and multiple tiers to manage, mix with with speed approaching 12-13 on the stimp made for a fun day. I will be back to play on my trips to AZ as it was a fun track.» Close
Ventured out on 3/28 with a 10:12 tee time. Weather was nice 62° light winds and just a beautiful day for golf. BB is practicing safe COVID-19 standar... » More
Ventured out on 3/28 with a 10:12 tee time. Weather was nice 62° light winds and just a beautiful day for golf. BB is practicing safe COVID-19 standards and had contact less service all around. Every player had their own cart and I think this helped with pace of play today. We got off right on time and finished in under 3 1/2 hours. The were groups a head but it was moving swiftly.
I really enjoy this course and its fair if you keep your tee shots in the short stuff. A few long holes and a few short one made for a fun day. Conditions are top notch right now given the peak season. Tee's were lush but needed a mow but nothing that would interfere with your shots. Fairways were like carpet and looked spectacular. Rough is still mostly dormant but the Bermuda is coming in. Next week its going to be warm so maybe 2 weeks and the Bermuda will be green. The greens had just been punched last Monday but they were a small needle punch and the sanded greens rolled smooth but slow. Given a week I think they will be fully healed up.
I recommend playing here if you can get a deal but....... the rack rate is way over the top and IMO not worth it for $280. If you have ClubCorp its $40.» Close
This review is for the BACK NINE ONLY!
Well after completing the front nine things changed about the fairways. They went from very nice and ... » More
This review is for the BACK NINE ONLY!
Well after completing the front nine things changed about the fairways. They went from very nice and over seeded to absolute garbage. You were better off hitting the rough for better lies. I The fairways were thin had bare spots and just not fun to play on. Even with lift clean and place it was tough to find a nice lie in most areas. I am not sure if they could not afford to over seed both 9's or what. It was definitely a let down after the front nine. The layout is still fun and the course has character but just be warned.
I'd still play here but my expectations will be low.» Close
This Review is for the FRONT NINE ONLY!
Please check the other review for the back nine. Rat-Patrol and I ventured out to Bernardo Heights Sat... » More
This Review is for the FRONT NINE ONLY!
Please check the other review for the back nine. Rat-Patrol and I ventured out to Bernardo Heights Saturday to play a GK match. The weather had been miserable all morning but when we got the the rain had stopped.
Course was soggy but the fairways on the front nice looked to have been over seeded and were a delight to play from. All the same grass and great cushion. Please read my next review about the back nine fairways as they are a different story.
Rough was nasty in areas which made us club up to get out. Sand was wet but of the 3 I was in 2 had plenty of sand 1 was a little thinner. Tee boxes were decent but looked to have not moved in a few days.
After paying Rat saw a calendar that said they punched 2 weeks ago. The guy in the pro shop said they still looked bad and that they had to put more sand down. Well Jim and I decided to play anyways because it was $25. Well the greens looked like they were punched yesterday. Lots of holes and I didn't see any of the sand they said the put down it made for a tough day putting.
Overall its a fun track that is not overly difficult and if in the area its not a bad place to play.» Close
Out with the Gk event yesterday and a blast was had. Course is not too tough but you need to manage your approach shots as spin was a little tough to ... » More
Out with the Gk event yesterday and a blast was had. Course is not too tough but you need to manage your approach shots as spin was a little tough to generate. I really enjoyed how lush the fairways and rough were as it was a nice surprise for the price we paid. The layout is pretty simple with a few long par 4's and a few reachable par 5's. My only down side for the course was the sand. I was in 2 green side traps and both had about 1/2" of soft sand and hard pack under I skulled a few by not being able to get under the ball. If you are in the area and want to play a cheap round Sun City West is a great choice.» Close
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