Matt Pisarski's Golf Statistics
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Matt Pisarski's Favorites
||John Daly & Anyone I beat|
Where Matt Pisarski Plays Golf
Los Angeles County; San Bernardino County; Riverside County; Palm Springs Area; Orange County; San Diego County; Ventura County; Santa Barbara County; Sacramento Area; Monterey Bay Area; Santa Cruz Area; San Luis Obispo Area; Las Vegas Area; Mesquite/St.George Area; Laughlin/Bullhead City; Phoenix Area; Western Arizona; Northern Arizona; Colorado; Northwest Coastal; Southwest Coastal; Seattle/Tacoma/Bremerton; Vancouver/Southwest; Spokane/Eastern; * Other
What's in Matt Pisarski's Golf Bag
UPDATED AFTER CLUBS STOLEN IN FEBRUARY 2019
Taylormade Sim Max USA Edition
Taylormade Sim 3wd
Callaway GBB Hybrid
Taylormade M6 4-AW
54º Callaway MD4
58º Callaway MD4
Odyssey Exo 7 putter
Cut DC Atomic Yellow Golf Balls
Bears & GK Towel
Garmin Approach 80
Last Updated: July 7, 2021
Follow me on Instagram mpisarski01
I love to play whenever I can and I love to play new courses. Please laugh at my terrible shots because I know I will.
Chuck Norris once Duffed a shot in Arizona and now we have the Grand Canyon
SO why does the golfer carry two shirts? In case he gets a hole in one.
What should you do if you're golfing near lightning? Hold your 2-iron in the air, because not even God can hit a 2-iron.
How do you know a golfer is cheating on his wife? He always puts his driver in the wrong bag.
How do you "Tiger" proof a golf course? By strategically placing fire hydrants.
Why are golf and sex so similar? They are the two things you can thoroughly enjoy even though you are really bad at them.
If you think it's hard to meet new people, pick up the wrong golf ball on the course sometime.
What's the difference between a golf ball and a Nissan? A golf ball can be driven 300 yards.
What do you do after a round of 18 on a hot sunny day? Wash your balls.
Do you know why the game is called golf? Because all the other four letter words were taken.
It's not the size of your putter that counts, its how many strokes you take.
A wife walked into the bedroom and found her husband in bed with his golf clubs. Seeing the astonished look on her face, he calmly said, "Well, you said I had to choose, right?"
If the point of golf is to hit the ball less, then do I win if I don't play at all?
Why don't golfers in England work in the afternoon? Because it would interrupt their tea time.
What does a golfer do on his day off? Putter Around.
Why do golfers put minus signs in front of their scores? Because subtraction speaks louder than words.
What did the duck say to the golf ball? Nothing it should have ducked.
Why did the blonde golfing pro cheat on his wife? Because he thought every day he needed to play around.
What did the golfer say after performing yoga? "Damn, my shaft is all bent."
What did the Mormon say to his golfing buddies? After 18 holes, I can barely walk.
Golf: a game where you yell fore, you get six, and you write five.
Mulligans are the reason golf balls come three to a sleeve.
"There are two things you can do with your head down, play golf and pray." -Lee Trevino
"Golf is my profession. Show Business is just to pay the greens fees." -Bob Hope
"You think so much of your old golf game that you don't even remember when we were married," said the pouting wife. "Of course I do, my dear -- it was the day I sank that thirty-foot putt."
Which is the easiest golf stroke? The fourth putt!
Three guys, a teenager, his father and his grandfather go out to play a round of golf. Just before the son is ready to tee off, this fine looking woman walks up carrying her clubs. She says her partner didn't show and asks if she can join them. The guys say sure, since she is quite a beautiful woman. The lady turns to the three of them and says, "I don't care what the three of you do, cuss, smoke, chew, spit, fart or whatever. Just don't try to coach me on my game". The guys say okay and ask if she would like to tee off first. All eyes are on her ass as her skirt rides up when she bends over to place the ball. She then proceeds to knock the hell out of the ball right up the middle. She just starts pounding these guys, paring every hole. They get to the 18th and she has a 12-foot putt for par. She turns around and says, "You guys have done a great job at not trying to coach me on my game. I've never shot par before, and I'm going to ask your opinions on this putt. Now if any of your opinions help me make the putt, I will give that guy a blow job he will never forget. " The guys think, 'what a deal!' The kid walks over, eyes up the putt for a couple of minutes, and finally says, "Lady, aim that putt six inches to the right of the hole. The ball will break left 12 inches from the hole and go in the cup." The father walks up and says, "Don't listen to the youngster, aim 12 inches to the right and the ball will break left 2 feet from the hole and fall into the cup." The grandpa looks at both of them in disgust, walks over picking up the ball, drops it into the cup, unzips his fly and says "That's a Gimme."
Golf Cart A man during his married years overturned his golf cart and a blonde said to him come to my place and rest. She was quite convincing and then took her clothes off once there. And he said "I don't think my wife is going to like this." And she answered "She will never know." He said "That's not the problem she's still under cart."
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Matt Pisarski's Golf Course Reviews
Booked a group for last Friday for a bachelor party. Most of the golfers in the group have never played anywhere nice so desert willow was a logical c... » More
Booked a group for last Friday for a bachelor party. Most of the golfers in the group have never played anywhere nice so desert willow was a logical choice. $55 on a Friday is totally worth it right now even though it was still over 100° this day. Check in was smooth and the cart guys prepped our carts and ice chests for the round. Course was fully sold out this day for both courses so the range was a little busy and POP was around 4:45 but never felt too slow.
Course is in good summer shape right now as previously reviewed a few weeks back. Tee boxes flat and many to choose from. Grass was lush and minimal divot damage. Fairways mostly lush with a few browning areas as they get ready for over seed in a few weeks. I never had a bad lie so no issues there. Sand was good and consistent in the 14 sand traps that I played from this day, fairways traps were a little more firm as expected and green side soft and easy to hit from. I did notice 2 traps where the liner is exposed on the lips so that will need a little TLC to fix. Greens were medium fast and a tad on the firmer side. They rolled smooth and held shots just fine. Rough was lush but had some bare spots here and there the farther offline you got.
Carts were nice with GPS, USB plug, ball/club washer and an cooler. Cart girl was around at least 5 times on the round and the on course restrooms had ice and water machines to keep you hydrated. Overall this is a must play course if in the desert area.» Close
Played 9/18 with 3 tee times starting at 9am. Check in was smooth cart guy must've had a long night as he wasn't very helpful but the pro shop guys we... » More
Played 9/18 with 3 tee times starting at 9am. Check in was smooth cart guy must've had a long night as he wasn't very helpful but the pro shop guys were nice as well as the snack bar ladies. This course is on the Fantasy Springs Casino land and is kind of hard to find if you are not paying attention. The pro shop is just an old trailer but it does the trick. Carts are basic with usb plug and old visage GPS systems. Driving range is medium sized with a chipping and putting area for a proper warm up.
Course was in good shape for it being late summer. mostly green with some browning grass here and there. All of my shots from the fairway had nice cushion and plenty of roll. Fairway sand traps were a little on the firm side but that is what you want when trying to hit longer shots out of the traps. Rough was also lush but not very penal with most balls sitting up just fine. Greens were in good shape medium fast and only a few ball marks from uncourteous golfers ahead of us. When on the range I noticed 3 groups ahead of us that looked like they had never swung a club :( . Green side sand was soft and very nice to hit from. Lots of water features which make for a beautiful day on the course.
This is a fun layout and not overly long but worth playing especially for the rates which are better than most of the courses in the valley.» Close
Played 9/6/21 at noon- Pace of play was 5HR 45MIN!!!!!!!
We tee'd off on time but had to wait on almost every tee box with multiple groups on... » More
Played 9/6/21 at noon- Pace of play was 5HR 45MIN!!!!!!!
We tee'd off on time but had to wait on almost every tee box with multiple groups on a few of the boxes. We had 4 groups waiting on hole 15. Marshall was around but as mark had mentioned in the prior review he didnt seem to care.
Course was just as Mark had said in the prior review. Fairways had good coverage and a mix of green and brown grasses but nice to play from. They offered ample roll out on shots as well which I enjoyed. Rough was a mix of grasses turning bare patches the farther offline you get and under the trees. Sand was horrible for the few that I encountered but playing partners didnt seem to find a bad one also none of them were raked. Greens were bumpy but in good shape, soft and receptive just need golfers to fix their marks.
This was my first trip to Industry hills and I thoroughly enjoyed the course but if 5hr 45min rounds are what they offer on the weekends I wont be back.» Close
Found a Teeoff.com time for last Sat 10:30am for $75. When I booked the round it was supposed to be 99º but that changes a few days before to 111º Whe... » More
Found a Teeoff.com time for last Sat 10:30am for $75. When I booked the round it was supposed to be 99º but that changes a few days before to 111º When I arrived I noticed the course was a little more brown than expected. The summer heat and humidity is taking a toll on the conditions this year. Now I expected some burned out areas but this was more than just a few areas.
Tee boxes were fine with full coverage and a little shaggy but just fine. We played the tips so not a ton of divots to be found anyways.
Fairways were good in spots but a few spots needed GUR ropes. I would say a mix of 60%brown to 40% green. all grass was nice to hit from so no issues there.
Rough was in decent shape more bare areas than I can remember also they were trimming all of the trees so a lit of loose leaves and branches.
Sand needs some TLC to be honest. I was in 6 traps two were great and the other were hard with pebbles in them.
Greens were firm with medium speed probably due to the longer length to keep them alive during the heat wave.
Carts were good with a nice GPS built into the dash and new Bluetooth speakers built into the under dash cubbies. They had coolers stocked with water but only two locations on course with a water station. Staff was very friendly as usual out at the resort. POP was a little brutal at 4hr 45 mins and made worse when two of the players in our group left at 9 holes. Even with the conditions being worse than expected I still enjoyed the round and after the fall maintenance the course should be good to go.» Close
Played on 8/13 with a 7:40 Tee Time. This is the third time I had played Laughlin ranch over the last 4 years and I am still excited every time I get ... » More
Played on 8/13 with a 7:40 Tee Time. This is the third time I had played Laughlin ranch over the last 4 years and I am still excited every time I get to play here. Staff was very friendly when I arrived and helped with the bags and informed me where to go when ready. I did not use the driving range but the large putting green was similar to what was on the course.
Course was in fantastic shape right now especially because of the 110+ heat they have been dealing with every day. Today we were luckily and had mostly cloudy sky's which kept the temp under 100. It was a bit humid but very bearable. Tee boxes where flat and had good coverage on each box. They did not have the back tee's open but the Zinc and Silver tee's were great. Fairways were just cut in the morning providing ample roll out and great cushy lies throughout the day. We had some bad timing with the blower tractor basically in front of us for 4 holes on the front nine and he even ran over Mikes golf ball. That was a little disappointing as the ball was clearly in sight. Rough was good and even though it didn't seem thick it was very penal and all of us had issues. Sand traps were not in good shape I was only in one and I used putter to get out due to the low lip. The other traps my partners were in were firm and had pebbles in them. Greens were in great shape but a little fuzzy as expected to keep them alive. They rolled true and medium to slow speeds. I found them tough to read but that may have been because of the longer than normal length.
I really like the layout here with the elevation changes and desert wasteland danger on every hole. Accuracy is a must especially with the penal rough and water hazards on a few of the holes. If you are in the area I highly recommend playing here. Even if you are in Vegas its worth the 1:20 drive.
PS the food at the restaurant was very good as well. We all ate off the bar menu but it was still fantastic.» Close
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